Reclaiming Self-Trust: The Missing Key for Women’s Well-Being
Ever wish you could trust yourself more? You’re not alone.
In this edition, I’ll share a story and some research-backed insights that might help you take your next step toward more confidence and clarity.
This monthly workshop offers a supportive next step if you’re ready for more ease, presence, and self-trust this holiday season.
Curious about how these ideas play out in real-life?
Check out my recent conversations with Maggie Pounds, where we unpack the messiness of staying connected to yourself, especially through the holidays and life’s unpredictable moments. It’s a candid, practical exploration of self-trust and body wisdom, honestly sharing what works (and what doesn’t) when everything feels chaotic.
A client recently returned to our world after spending thousands on a personal transformation program that promised the world—and delivered very little. She shared:
“I realize now that there are a lot of people out there promoting (personal r/evolution) programs, charging a lot of money, while over-promising and under-delivering. That’s not a dynamic I want to be a part of, as a participant or a leader.” — Lee Shane (Emerging Thought Leader, Educator & Elder)
Her words resonated deeply, because I’ve been there too. Just this summer, I spent $5000 (yes, US dollars!) on a coaching program I knew, in my gut, wasn’t right for me. But the picture-perfect solutions and the hope for “expert” relief were tempting.
Ultimately, that led to a visceral but expensive reminder:
The answers are always inside me. The real work is learning to recognize whether my inner voice is echoing fear and lack, or pointing me toward what’s truly right for me.
Deep down, we all know this to be true. But we also know the temptation to give in to the voice that keeps us small.
I'm here to tell you: it's not your fault. We live in a society (aka culture, mindset, paradigm) that teaches us mistrust as a process.
The personal is political
If you're paying attention, you can sense it everywhere—the unmistakable presence of trust slowly wearing away.
We are, after all, living in an unprecedented time, where the very definition of what it means to be human is up for grabs.
This negotiation of ‘reality’, as amplified by the noise of AI, is leading to a trust recession in our relationships, institutions, and most importantly, ourselves.
The result? An epidemic of anxiety, self-doubt, and exhaustion that’s hitting women harder than ever before.
For example, 40% of young Canadian women are struggling with anxiety or other mental health issues—nearly double the national average for their age group.
When women don’t trust themselves, they experience higher rates of mental distress and decision fatigue, which leaves us feeling exhausted and depleted, or worse — duped.
So this isn’t just about overpriced programs, AI generated noise, or manipulative "leaders"; it’s about a culture that normalizes gaslighting and pushes us to second-guess our own inner wisdom.
On a personal level, here's how lack of self-trust shows up in daily life:
endless second-guessing, like that the internal dialogue and hesitation before responding to a simple email,
the tension in your chest when someone questions your choices,
the restless nights spent replaying conversations in your head.
the compulsion to scroll and compare.
the urge to push down your own needs just to keep the peace.
the exhaustion from pouring energy into everyone else while quietly longing for the confidence to be real.
...shall I go on?
Like I said, it's not your fault ... but it is your responsibility.
If you don’t find a way to trust yourself now, you’ll keep feeling uncertain, stuck, and searching outside for what can only be reclaimed within—repeating old cycles, desperately hoping for new results.
When we trust ourselves, we can change the outcome of our experience—you just have to know HOW.
Believe it or not, what's getting in the way of you trusting yourself are outdated beliefs about yourself, your worth, and your power.
Our bodies never lie, but most of us have been taught to ignore our inner cues in favor of being nice, polite, or accommodating.
Over time, those sensations get tangled up inside, becoming anchors that cause confusion—and we stop trusting ourselves to tell the difference between what’s true and what’s expected.
Do you know how to tell the difference between what is an authentic desire and what is an obligation?
If you don’t, you’re not alone. All the women I work with struggle with this.
And it makes sense because none taught us how to tell the difference. Instead, as well meaning as our parents may have been, they wanted us to comply more than they wanted us to be authentic.
But I want you to know this: none of that matters because YOU can take ownership of your life, here and now. It may not be your fault that you had the trauma you did, but it’s your responsibility to become more than your history.
Now, for the good news: Self-trust can be cultivated.
Once you become familiar with what gets in the way, once you can name it, you can begin to take ownership of it so you can intentionally change it.
I highlight the word intentionally because habits don't ever break by themselves.
That demands we show up, pay attention, and choose.
In doing so, we develop a deeper level of self-trust.
Which, by the way ...
Self-trust is our birthright.
And it's the foundation of meaningful change and personal freedom.
It all starts with a willingness to question what you think you know as you get curious about what you don’t know you don’t know. That’s where power lives.
See that green dot?
That’s the point of power.
The domain of the unknown is where expansion and evolution happens.
But you and I are taught to try to fit all that there is into the box of “I know”.
In the nanosecond you do that, you collapse potential and possibility (and therefore power) into a tiny box called “cultural conditioning”.
Stuck, is the only possibility there.
If you are curious about HOW to:
break the cycle of seeking approval and validation from others,
become a confident decision-maker anchored in your own values,
and create outcomes rooted in integrity and clarity of vision...
Then check out "Staying Centered in the Holiday Chaos".
After all, self-trust is the key missing piece that unlocks intimate, authentic relationships.
I wish more women knew just how possible it is.
In fact, it’s often easier than we imagine.
But to arrive at ease, you have to be willing to face the hard—and that’s a courageous choice.
My promise: I can show you how to do it safely.
All you need to do is bring your willingness.
Curious about what gets in the way of you living authentically?
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